Thursday, January 31, 2008

dispite of my rage i am still just a rat in a cage

Yes I am alive. Somewhere in all this. I have some great pictures from all the snow this week, but as per usual I have had no time in which to post them or write.

I finally have a meeting scheduled for Tuesday morning where I plan to lower the boom. I just don't know what I am fighting for anymore. But I am tired of talking about it so I will spare you all.

Chad put a $2500 new liquor cabinet on our gift registry at the Bay. If anyone wants to go buy it for him just go the Bays website and search our names and go for it! HA. But yes, people have been asking me so if for whatever reason you feel the need to buy us a wedding gift or you are in fact lucky enough to be invited this blessed event and would like to purchase something we are registered at The Bay and Home Outfitter. Just so ya know.

I have this picture of Jason Lee printed and hanging in front of my desk for inspiration, but all it makes me do is actually dress like that every day for work. I use to attempt to be all fashionable and businessy but now I’ve completely thrown that out the window and end up wearing plaid and converse all day every day. The way I see it, Fall/Winter is all about hoodies and sneakers, and Spring/Summer is all about fashion and dressing nice.

Bring on the hobos.

Monday, January 28, 2008

hold me close young tony danza

Our party of engagements was this past Saturday night. There was a full house aside from some of our peeps who couldn't make it due to all the snow and ice, but overall it was quite packed.

After watching the NHL Skills Competition and playing a little Guitar Hero we headed downtown to Ceilis for some food and drinks and celebration.

There was too much going on and too many people to talk to so I didn't take any pictures but rather "borrowed" some from Pat and Marlee. Here they is in no particular order.


Marlee and Dario

Chad and I

Dario loves his food!


Shots for us, though Chad was a poor sport and blew whipped cream on everyone.

Robyn!


Chad, me & Alicia

I was trying to be hot, hahaha.

Steve and Dario singing.


Patrick Zaph



Best.Shot.Ever.

Demis & Dario

Nice face Adam.

Livin' on a Prayer

Candice, Marlee, Dario, Hoda, & Demis

Italian Stallions

Such an angel




I dont know why I look so serious here.

Aww Me & Marlee

We RULE.


omg dont ask.

Skytrain Home.


Demis is Statue Mario

The night was pretty kick ass even though I didn't get a chance to talk to everyone I wanted to chat with cause people left at all different times.

Some guy came up to me and tried to dance with me even though I was standing there and not dancing. Then he started going on about how he is foreign and I should hold that against him. Then he started to grind up against me so I showed him my hand signaling to him that I am taken but he miss read my gesture and began to make out with my hands and I stood there looking at him like WTF??? I went and told Chad but by the time I did that he was already gone. Very bizarre.

Some of my best friends from high school Sasha & Rene showed up on their way to a wedding. It was so awesome seeing them again. I have no pictures of them though which sucks. But hopefully we will all be able to get together again soon and there will be lots of pictures taken.

I just wanted to THANK everyone for coming out to celebrate with us. Patz, Candice, Dario, Marlee, Demis, Hoda, Steve, Ashleigh, Jonathan, Jenaya, Ryan, Elise, Ryan, Francesca, Pat, Jaz, Mike, Cheryl, Neil, Rebecca, Rene, Sasha, Cristina, Chu, Robyn, Alicia, and Adam. I think I got everyone.

It was fun times a million!

P.S. - Here is the sweetest post Patz has ever written. Go read it!

Friday, January 25, 2008

life lessons

Monday night started off with a consultation with a photographer that both Chad and I loved. I first saw them at the wedding fair and knew I had to meet with them. After finding out they were free on September 6th I made every effort to set up a meeting. I was very excited to see what they had to offer and excited over the possibility of having them take our pictures.

I came away from the meeting on Monday completely in love. I got home to tell my parents all about it (since they would be the ones paying for it after all) and was sure they would see my excitement and follow suit. Not so much. Seeing as this was the first photographer I had met with they felt I should meet with more before making me decision, and rightly so.

But the thing with me is, as much as it sounds like an excuse it, the Italian in me makes me an extremely passionate person, as well, the exact opposite of that, a rage filled person. Meaning that my emotions can jump from one extreme to another in a matter of seconds. When I love something I love it to the fullest extent, and when I hate something or am mad there is just as much emotion put into that.

So in this case, my love for this photographer coupled with my parents less then enthusiastic reaction sent me in a spiraling fit of rage. And when you are filled with rage all rationalisation leaves your brain until you break something and come back to reality. Fortunately for everyone, my rage was surprisingly controlled and only last half an hour. The reason for all the drama was simply because the photographer said they were booking up quickly and if I wanted to use them I should book as soon as possible. This translated into my mind that I need to convince my parents to hand me over thousands of dollars ASAP so I could fulfill my passionate dream of having them take my pictures. No one else would do.

After my ridiculous over reaction I decided to be rational and create a list of 20 photographers with prices and packages as to show my parents that the photographer I wanted was being totally reasonable and that they should just follow my instinct to book them. Seeing as how much I wanted them to be a part of my day. Little did I know that this list would come in quite handy in the days to come.

So I went to bed that night with this awful feeling in my stomach over the way I reacted and pondering the possibility of loosing this photographer because I waited to long to tell them yes. All of this was quickly dispelled in the morning when my mom said I could go ahead and book them.

I was on cloud nine.

Tuesday and Wednesday went by with out a hitch. Paper work was filled out and I was breathing a sigh of relief that I didn't have to worry about booking a photographer.

But secretly in the back of my mind I thought to myself that this all happened way too easily. I barely did research and became so close minded to any other options. I began to worry that maybe I wasn't getting a good deal and I should have looked around more. But this was silenced by convincing myself that I went with my gut feeling and I shouldn't second guess myself.

The Thursday came.

To add to all this stress and emotion over booking things for the wedding, work was being a complete nightmare. Too many things were being asked of me and I was making myself crazy trying to make everyone happy. I was working late, running around, pulling my hair out of my head.

It was 4:30 on Thursday night when I was attempting to finish up some paper work for the administration office. Someone comes running in from the warehouse explaining that they are doing inventory tomorrow and I have to fix all these sample tonight because they need to be scanned tomorrow morning. So I comply and end up being at work until 6pm, only getting half of the job done.

I arrive home late and exhausted. My mom tells me the photographer called and to call him back. So I grab the phone and give him a call. Worst.News.Ever. It seems he somehow double booked the date and is in fact NOT available that day and want to know if there was any way I could move my wedding date. Excuse me. You want me to move my wedding date because you are an ass hat and somehow made a huge mistake. Well his phone died so I never got the answer. He apparently called back but my brother was on the phone. How could it be that he realized a week after my initial inquiry that he wasn't free that day. Do you not look at your calendar???

I was devastated. Not only because they screwed me over but because I felt betrayed. I was so excited to have them. I was ready to tell the world about how amazing their pictures were and how excited I was. All to be crushed. Now I had to start the process all over again. I was emotionally worn out.

I woke up feeling horrible. I was so mad by what had happened I couldn't even muster the strength to dress up today. I look like a bum.

Then I get to work only to find out that what I had to stay late to do the night before was actually a big waste of time (which I figured it was but didn't want to question anyones authority). Great, lets add fuel to the fire.

I am so emotionally and physically drained right now. My brain is fried and it is so god damn hot in this building right now I want to scream. I don't even have the energy to be mad anymore. I just want to forget it all and move on. I just want to find someone to replace and fix this mess. I just want this wedding planning to be done so I dont have to think and worry about it any more. Now I know why people want to elope.

The only thing I can think to myself is what was the point of all this? What lesson am I suppose to come away with? I work hard so that I am able to achieve and get what I want for it all to come to nothing.

Im just in such a negative spot right now. I needed to vent.

Thursday, January 24, 2008

split ends are no match for my scissors



OK. I will admit. The sun during the past couple days has in fact made me quite pleasant these days.

Work has been damn near insane every day this week and will only get worse next week when we attempt to do inventory. My Italian-isms for yelling and looking like I am going to kill people have come into full effect. It's not a good thing.

Parts of my hair are fading to orange. Again.

Chad is not online and it is making me spastic. But not seriously. Just mildly. I need my morning Ciavarro.

OH I have to tell you about last night but I need the pictures first. Lets just say my personal wealth rose by $1500.

Saturday is our engagement party.

And YES I booked the photographer and it excites me to no end.

There is a scary white van parked outside my window that has been there all night. CREEPY.

Oh and Duane took that picture.

And my stomach hurts.

Cuddles anyone?

Monday, January 21, 2008

She is tolerable, I suppose, but not handsome enough to tempt me.

These pictures are oldish.


Attractive much?







So I finally put my foot down and told Chad that the next 5 movies we watch are not allowed to be about or include the following...

  • War
  • Guns
  • Death
  • The Mafia
  • Explosions
  • Hostage Taking
  • Police
  • Killings
  • Money
  • Drugs
  • Computers
  • Stuff that confuses me

In the year and a half that we have been together every movie except for maybe 5 have included one or more of the following. And really, I am down with war, I am down with people killing people, I am down with the Mafia, but after a year and a half of Band of Brother marathons and watching 7 seasons straight of The Sopranos and RARELY EVER getting my pick of movies I have had enough!

We watched Inside Man last night, which WAS good I will admit, but after the slue of death and guns and running from people that has been every TV show/ Movie in the past little while I was so done.

GIVE ME FLUFF. Give me a movie where I don't have to think. Give me a movie where blood is not spewing in every scene. Give me a movie where I actually have the chance to smile and laugh and come away from it happy, not completely drain and depressed.

While Chad is on the edge of his seat completely engrossed I am burried under pillows half falling asleep because I have given up trying to undertsand what the hell is going on.

I have fallen asleep to Star Wars, The Matrix, Mission Impossible, and quite possibly Lord of the Rings.

These movies just aren't my bag baby.

And apparently MY movies are only to be watched during the day since night movie watching is PRIME movie watching and my movies don't cut it.

Oh just wait until I make him sit through 6 hours straight of Pride and Prejudice, especially since I know just how much he LOVES Colin Firth. It will be magical!

Thursday, January 17, 2008

tonight there is homework


Photo by PatZ!

So I'm typing up the guest list right now. It's not finalized and its almost 300 people, which could pose as a problem. Luckily about 20 of them are relatives from over seas, Australia and Italy, and they will most likely not come, except for a few exceptions.

Our hall fits 250 people using the round tables, 300 people long tables. We want the round tables so I'm praying everything works out.

I bought the paper to make the invitations. I made a sample and it looks oh so pretty. I ordered the envelopes and hopefully they will be here next week. Now its a matter of collecting addresses. I am all about getting things done a head of schedule.

I looked at wedding dresses but they all bore me. I tried some on in front of my bridesmaids and felt like a fool. I am not the kind of person who wants everyone staring at them, which is impossible to avoid on your wedding day. My mother insists that we go to more places to try on my dresses but I am pretty set on making it myself with some assistance. I found a picture of the exact one I want with a few alterations. All I need to do is get some fabric from work and have atter.

The bridesmaids dresses are another story. We found ones we like for $175 each which is a little much. Again, I want to make them (cause I am so damn picky) but my mom thinks that would be too stressful. So we found some at this store. They were on sale for $30. I only half like them and have this feeling they are going to look horrible on the girls. I just need to look more before I decide.

Chads incharge of the booze, (obviously) and transportation (I want a Hummer SUV). We looked at tux' for the guys last night. I think I've figured out what I want, and Chad has no preferences other then he doesnt want to die of heat. I'll see what I can do.

We dont have a photographer yet, or someone to decorate, or a lot of things for that matter. I need to get going on these things.

8 months and counting.

If you want to visit our wedding website and leave a comment feel free to do so here.

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

lets go back to season one

Busy busy. Crazy crazy. Story of my life!

On Sunday we snuck away from doing wedding stuff and decided to join Duane downtown for a Photo Walk. Chad of course did not bring his camera, but rather, brought a flask of scotch. How fitting.

Here is a sampling of my pictures...



















I am no longer a flickr virgin so you can view all of my pictures on here. As well, all the other pictures that were taken that day by other people can be viewed here.

It was nice to finally get out doors and go downtown after being cooped inside for who knows how many days. And it was pretty much perfect that the weather cooperated up until we got home and then it started to pour down like a mother.

I spent the night watching Father of the Bride 2, cause I have a soft spot for those movies. They almost always make me tear up at one part or another. I'm such a suck. Chad spent the evening playing CIV with people online. Such a nerd.

Yesterday we had another one of our famous wind storms. It was pretty crazy out and trying to carry a bunch of fabric out to the car seems near impossible. After dinner I had a shower and then headed over to Chad to find him and PatZ on the couch completely possessed by Guitar Hero 3. Apparently Pat only had one guitar so Chad drove him out to UBC to buy another one second hand so they could both play together. OBSESSED.

After Guitar Hero we watched the second to last episode of the Sopranos where everyone dies and it was horrible. As bad as all the characters are I still love them and didn't want to see them die. The whole night I had nightmares that I was part of the New York family and New Jersey was trying to kill me and I had to travel all secretly and then I got shot at and it was horrible. No matter how many times I woke up during the night I kept going back into the dream. Its no fun running away from mobsters who are trying to kill you.

Damn you Phil Leotardo.